Thank you in advance for going through my letter. It is indeed a pleasure to speak to you as a child.
I come to you as a child with an extra-ordinary childhood where I learnt the value of rationality, of fairness, of true education and of right virtues. I carry all these qualities with me as I still remain a child because I just don’t want to grow up and kill my rainbow of thoughts. My parents always said that we must walk the talk and be fair to everyone. So, when I got to watch television for an hour a day, my parents also had the same rule for themselves. My father never watched cricket or football and, at the same time, asked me to study. My mother never went for ladies parties or meets while me or my sister were at home because she wanted to focus on us rather than have fun. My parents never even went to watch movies leaving us behind at home. This is what fairness was to them and what I have learnt well.
I was never asked to attend tuition classes because my parents felt that would kill my time to play. Whatever marks I could get on my own was acceptable to my parents because it was a result of my hard work alone. I was never asked what marks had the kid who stood 1st in class got. I was only asked my marks at home. If I did well, they were happy. If I did not do well, they would say such things happen and you have done to your best. I was never beaten at home because that was unreasonable.
Now imagine your child coming to you and telling you everyday – (after you have come back from work) Daddy, how come you only have a Maruti 800 while the neighbour has a Honda City, or (after you slogged for 2 hours to cook food) Mom, you don’t know how to cook, bagal waali (neighbour) aunty cooks so much better than you. Then, how would your child feel if you kept on doing so with them for years. Someday, they will just stop listening to what you say.
If your child’s handwriting is very untidy and one fine day he/she decides to make serious effort to write well, why do you have to say – Oh! Tell me who did this? You can just give a soft praise for the efforts, right? It is such an easy thing to do.
Why is it that – Hey! I am your father. You respect me and be dead scared of me! Why can’t it be – I want to be your best friend, son. I will do all it takes to do so.
Why is it that when they run around a park or a mall, or shout in an auditorium about going home, you always have to say don’t do this! They are just being honest about the way they perceive and do things. Why is it that you cannot bear their mistakes? They pardon all your mistakes!
Why do you have to say – In our times, things were like this! In those days, we never did that! Whatever this and that is, you must realize that neither is this your time, nor is it those days. This time belongs to your children. They adapt to the environment in a manner you couldn’t possibly dream of. They are way intelligent than you and they always make an effort to be nice to you.
I know a child who was criticized by other (family and others), but never by her parents. She would write a reverse C, a reverse D, E, F and all other alphabets (mirror images). She would call Raju as Jura and even wear wrong shoes almost every time. People would call it a learning disability but the parents would believe that this is not even a problem at all. The entire family had a science background but she went on to study commerce because that is what she could do right. She went to an ordinary college because she could not get good marks but the parents were always patient with her. She wanted to become a journalist ever since she was in ‘3rd Class’. Her father was a good man and expected nothing from her. She went on to do masters in business journalism just because the parents did not want her sitting at home doing nothing. And on 10th July 2013 (that is right, today) she was hired by CNBC TV-18. So, that is the story of my baby sister whose life could have gone all wrong had the parents been ‘PARENTS’. And I am on cloud 9 today!!!
A lot of parents of today are really amazing, but for others – I hope I could bring about a little change in your perspective towards you child.
(Childhood is too precious, so I decided never to give it up and grow in life)